In a press release today, the National Institute of Health has announced the discovery of a potentially dangerous substance in the hair of horses.
This substance, called "amobacter equuii" has been linked with the following symptoms in females:
Reluctance to cook, clean or do housework.
Reluctance to wear make-up, good clothes or heels.
Reluctance to spend money on home or car repairs until after "baby has new shoes, pad, blanket, tack, grain, hay & supplements".
"Amobacter equuii" usually results in long hours away from home and exhaustion which may lead to a loss of physical contact with other humans (especially husbands).
"Amobacter equuii" is thought to be addictive, driving the need for additional sources - this may lead to a "herd mentality" or, like the potato chip commercial, "you can't have just one".
Beware! If you come in contact with a female human infected by this substance, be prepared to talk about horses for hours.
Surgeon General's Warning: Horses are expensive, addictive, and may impair the ability to use common sense.